Sunday, December 19, 2010


Well today I am a bit pooped from all the hectic activity in my social calendar as well as all the drama in my head. I am still feeling better, but I think I will take some time to recharge.

Today one of those surprise Step-Up friends is coming over to talk with me. It'll be fun as well as a nice way for me to connect a bit, and maybe get some ideas or insight or something! Tomorrow another surprise Step-Up friend is coming for lunch, and I expect the same - although, of course, completely different.

I am still thinking about two friends in particular from whom I expected more. And how disappointed I was to discover them to be fair-weather friends. One of them was so terribly unkind that I have discontinued the relationship completely, but the other is in a relationship with yet another friend and so I can't really sever ties. And if I stop caring about wanting more from her, she will likely be just as pleasant and interesting as ever. But as I look through my friendship history, I realize I have never had a friend that was superficial. If they were superficial people, the contact was short-lived. If we couldn't find a common ground that I was more comfortable with, the contact was short-lived.

There are indeed people that were closer and have now drifted away with whom I still have contact - some family members, for example - but I just don't make an effort and I don't miss them. I suppose that is what I have to look forward to with this particular woman. I'm not sure what to make of that.

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