Thrilled! Just Thrilled!

Do I ever have some fantastic news!!

I have been offered a gig at my gym leading the Senioren Fit (obvious translation probably, but it's the Senior's Fitness) Monday mornings!

I'm a real personal trainer... with a JOB!

I still lack in confidence - but I'm like that. Until I am awesome at something, I think I suck. But my boss thinks I can do a great job, the seniors love me (awww) and I can improve my sports-Dutch as well as my ability to lead a group of really fun people. None of them are good followers, but they try and seem to like a little bit of change and challenge, so they'll keep me hopping!

There is also talk of another hour or two, as-needed, to work with individual clients on their own fitness programs.

I'm so pleased with myself and how my life is going. There are so many struggles I have every day, over small things such as laundry or what to have for dinner, but the big picture... man, is that ever a beautiful sight!

And I am learning about what really matters. I can be such a perfectionist, and I can lose sleep about things that might go wrong... or I can make another choice. I can see what a great life I have, how full it is with wonderful friends and family, and how it keeps getting better and better!!

Self-Doubt Attacks!

I am surprised to find myself lacking in confidence and conviction. It is very uncomfortable!

I am now a personal trainer. I have been interested and active and informed about fitness and fitness-related areas in a more-than-average fashion for many years (with a 2-year hiatus due to a car accident and a nasty fibro flareup). I am very fit and very strong.

Yet I can't seem to meet my own fitness goals.

Well... that's not entirely true. I set a goal of running a 10K race, and met that after 3 months of training. I discovered along the way that I don't enjoy running much. But, if I ever needed to run at a fairly slow pace for an hour or longer - say, escaping a vicious, geriatric killer, or a zombie, I could. Both categories of potential attackers are notoriously slow. As am I.

I also set a goal of returning to my pre-accident/illness flexibility, strength, and weight. I've done that. Which is quite a huge accomplishment, and one I tend to dismiss because it took a little bit of work... every single day. A bit like brushing my teeth. I do it every day, and while I enjoy compliments on my great teeth and smile, I don't feel particularly proud to still have teeth. But back in the day, when people didn't know about teeth-brushing, lots of them had no teeth left by my ripe old age of 37. So, while my amazing progress is wonderful, it's also no surprise.

So what am I feeling so discouraged and self-doubting about? Well, it seems I still have a high percentage of body-fat. This doesn't make sense to me scientifically, as I:

1. am reasonably careful about my diet (far more than most people, but I don't completely exclude treats or meals out).
2. have lifted weights consistently over the past two years with the purpose of increasing muscle fibres and muscle density. This is not only to give my body a shape I like, but muscle needs more calories to sustain even just sitting around, so more muscle = more calories burned just doing nothing.
3. am an active person, participating in aerobics classes, cycling all over town to run errands, and other kinds of aerobic training.

I just don't get it. And I think I should, given my knowledge and experience. So... bring on the self-doubt.

Actually, bring on consulting someone I trust to know better. I don't have to have all the answers, I just have to care enough to find someone who has the answers I need. For now.

Microcosm of My Life

This week was really exciting, but also a bit overwhelming. I've set aside the first half of 2o11 to focus on myself... really focus on myself. It feels quite weird, from time to time, but my goal is get to know myself and to give myself a good foundation for the rest of my life.

For my inner happiness I am exploring interests such as personal training, learning French, and socializing more. I'm also working with a life coach, which I've written about here and here, to learn how to love myself unconditionally.

For my physical happiness I am working with a physiotherapist to get limiting pain under management so I can freely pursue my fitness goals. I'm seeing a massage therapist regularly to help with pain management, relaxation and recovery. (I don't think I've mentioned it before, but I have fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndromes. I am currently relatively asymptomatic, and I'm working on keeping it that way!) I'm also back lifting weights a couple of times per week, after trying to focus on aerobic activity for a few weeks and finding that it's still not my cup of tea! I've also started working with a Cesar-therapeut.

What the heck is a Cesar-therapeut? That's what I asked when my massage therapist mentioned it. Therapeut means therapist in Dutch, but that didn't really clarify anything for me. So I googled it. Ummmm. Yeah.

Bravely, based much more on my massage therapist's suggestion than on any understanding of what might happen, I made an appointment. I had my first visit last week. I have never heard of any practitioner in Canada doing anything similar, so I just have to describe it. Basically, a Cesar-therapeut works with people to improve how they move. They work with all age groups in lots of different ways.

After getting me to strip to my undergarments and submit myself to her steely gaze from all angles, my therapeut looked up from her clipboard and said, "Well, you stick your butt out, so then your belly sticks out to compensate, and then you hold your upper-back too far back to compensate, and then you have to round your shoulders forward to compensate for that." I'd been wondering why I've lost a lot of body fat but still had a sticky-out belly!!

In about 5 minutes she had me doing a couple of exercises to correct all of that, that I'm supposed to keep doing on my own. I found it very interesting because the point of the therapy is to get my body moving more naturally - rather than still moving the way I did when I was compensating for intense, constant pain during a two-year-long fibro flareup. And for me to do that on my own, rather than ongoing visits. She wants me to not have to come back at all!

Another new thing that happened this week was an invitation from my boss' business partner to set up a marketing planning sesssion for our gym with the key players at work. This came out of a bunch of marketing ideas I described for them, just for kicks, a few months back. They thought I knew what I was talking about and I'm now exploring a third role at my job! Receptionist, personal trainer, marketing dynamo!

I also ran 5 billion errands, counselled my husband who was really in quite a funk for a few days, worked crazy shifts and had a meltdown about feeling so full of enthusiam and ideas and so stuck on what to do next! Also about my work schedule for next month, but that I resolved by telling the colleague who does up the shift schedule what my limitations are going to be from now on. Assertiveness is my middle name. Ha!

So yes, my life is in a state of limbo, and it drives me nuts. I like to KNOW everything. I don't like plans changing, I don't like the unexpected, I don't like the unknown. But, on the other hand, I am absolutely sure that I am on a great path, that I have a great partner, and that no matter what the future holds, I will be happy anyways!

Wanna Get Fit?

Wanna get fit? Just call me! I earned my Personal Trainer Certificate with a score of 92% on the exam. I still have lots to learn, and I hope I always feel that way! It's so exciting to know that I have a solid base, and have lots of options for my own growth while guiding others to reach their own goals!

For my own development as a trainer, I currently have four goals.

1. Find the beginning, and start there.
   
2. Keep it simple.
   
3. Keep it short.
   
4. Keep it fun.

Each client has their own starting point. If I were to get a job working in a gym similar to where I work now, most clients are not very informed or interested in fitness. Most clients come to the gym for their health, for their appearance, or for fun with their friends. In contrast, I go to the gym because I really enjoy how proud I feel lifting increasingly heavy weights, or testing my limits with interval training.

So what I have to keep in mind is that a potential client will fall anywhere along the myriad continua of fit-unfit, informed-uninformed, experienced-inexperienced, and enjoyment of working out. What they all have in common is an interest in getting or staying fit.

I am developing a fairly standard set of questions that cover what I need to know about my client before developing a plan. I need to know about their health, their eating habits and activity level, what activities they enjoy, and their goals. I also need to know what they 'know' about fitness. Oftentimes people don't realize that information has changed, or that they've misunderstood something. Not every question needs to be asked, some would only come up if the client asked about it.

It's important to start with the basics.

• Why is the client here?
  
• What do they already do in support of their goal?
  
• What is the thinking behind what they're doing?
  
• Is it getting them what they want?
  
• What are their limitations?

Some friends have volunteered to be guinea pigs, and hopefully a few more will be taking the plunge! It doesn't matter too much for now whether they are Dutch or English speaking. I can't wait to see what I can learn from them!

Personal Trainer - or Lifestyle Coach??

There's a new kind of personal trainer that seems to be developing in Holland. Lifestyle coach. The definition of this kind of coach is still evolving, but I'm certainly intrigued.

A lifestyle coach is someone that has a more personal relationship with the client, almost like a fitness therapist or counsellor. The lifestyle coach works to support a client as they make changes in their life. They are usually going through transitions, from burned-out to healthy, from unfit to fit, from fit to fitter, what-have-you. I like the sounds of this.

I love the part about having an ongoing relationship. I am not that interested in just coming up with the same-old same-old routines for people, I am interested in helping THAT person reach HIS goals. And the only way to do that, is to take the time to develop the relationship and learn what his goals really are.

I say really are because people are full of baloney, especially when it comes to fitness. They have no idea how to define a goal such as 'I want to be fit'. I can't say that I have any answers, because of course the answers need to come from the client. And that takes time for them to figure out. People have no idea what they can do, and are surprised at how strong they are when they are pushed. They are also surprised at how tiring and time-consuming jumping in gung-ho can be. Some, like me, are extremely slow to learn. I would never intentionally lie, to a trainer or to myself, but I continually over-estimate my stamina and ability to recover, and underestimate the value of slow-and-steady-wins-the-race.

Another benefit to developing a relationship is that the groundwork is laid so that injuries due to bad form or over-training can be avoided. The client is a partner in reaching his or her goals, not just someone who has asked your professional advice. I like the sound of that.

Something else that sounds very attractive to me is that the target market for a lifestyle coach would be people going through change. They would specifically be looking for someone to help them make changes that they are struggling to make on their own. So I could be a great support, temporarily.

I'll have to check it out!

Personal Trainer In Training

I have been spending a couple of hours twice a week with a personal trainer at my gym. Boy am I learning a lot!!

The goal of this time is for me to gain practical experience as a personal trainer. If I had this job, at my gym, I would be responsible for developing programs for all sorts of people. I would also be responsible for just being there to answer questions, to help someone with form, suggestions, or as a spotter. I'd be there in case of emergencies and to do some light cleaning, such as emptying all the wastepaper baskets of the tons of paper towel that get tossed in there after clients wipe down their machines.

I was aware of some challenges going in:

1. I am officially fluent in Dutch, but the fitness world has a jargon all it's own. I am often unfamiliar with the names for things. What's more of a challenge is knowing how to explain to people how to perform exercises.
2. I am not sure how to balance working with people as both an authority figure and a partner in their progress.

I have discovered that the language problem is really more of my problem than an objective challenge. Memorizing specific phrases, using body language, and using English if I get desperate are all fairly simple solutions. (Most Dutch people also speak at least reasonable English, sometimes also another two or three languages.) I just have to let go of that perfectionism that sometimes stops me from trying if I don't feel certain.

The part about balancing how I work with people leads me to the challenge I found once I started practicing what I've learned. And that is: Find the beginning, and start there!

The feedback I've gotten has been that I can improve in three key areas:

1. Keep it simple ~ The clients need to know in summary that their program will get them to their goals. If they are interested, they'll ask for more information.
2. Keep it short ~ The clients need to know what to focus on. That's it.
3. Keep it fun ~ The clients need to enjoy their workouts and see results.

This new path I'm trying out is a challenge! But, it's one I can definitely meet. It will call for patience, attention, and practice.

Super-Proud of Me

I am so pleased with how I'm developing as a person.

Back in May I got a new job working at a gym. It's the gym I've belonged to since shortly after I moved to Holland. It's a great place, here's the link if you want to check it out: warning, the website is not the best and it's all in Dutch!

Anyway, my goal in working there was to get acquainted with the Dutch working culture (which is very different than what I'm used to in Canada - I'll blog about that soon). And, to improve my Dutch to the point that I could later get a job which relies on my ability to communicate, which are the kinds of jobs I always had in Canada.

My current job is mostly great. I'm a receptionist, but it's not like anything I'm used to in Canada. I work about 3 shifts per week - none of them are great shifts in terms of fitting into the rest of my life, mostly evenings and weekends, which is the not-great part of my job. The great part is huge. I have great colleagues, I can easily do the job itself, the challenge is indeed the language and so I can happily leave my work behind when I go home for the day. As a receptionist, I answer the telephone and make reservations for guests to play squash, tennis, or participate in a group class such as spinning. I take messages for the administration, pass on concerns and compliments from guests to colleagues, sell products such as towels, rackets, and sunbed-glasses. I explain and sell memberships, turn on the steamroom and sauna, chat with guests about everything under the sun, and accept people's membership cancellations.

90% of what I do I do easily and well because the job relies on my personality. I am great with people, and even when I first started, when my Dutch wasn't so great, everyone could still communicate with me and enjoyed asking me about my accent and telling me about their trips to Canada. The downside to the job is that it doesn't ask enough of me. And I knew that right from the start.

So what I did was start taking a personal training course. I used the down time at work to study - sometimes there is a lot of downtime, and although I can wander off to get a cup of tea, help a guest with something, or go to the bathroom, I am supposed to mostly be sitting behind the desk in case the phone rings or in case a guest needs me. So I used that time to study, and I studied very hard, and I did extremely well on my exam.

Then I talked to my boss. I explained to him that even though I have all this knowledge, I didn't feel I could move forward without experience. He offered to let me work with the trainers at the gym, and although I wouldn't be paid, and there wasn't a job opening right now, I could do that for as long as I liked.

I think that is awesome. He's confident enough in my personality, my professionalism, my knowledge and my ability to let me represent his gym in a new way. And he doesn't make it easy for me. The first client on the first day, he went through his normal routine, although of course he introduced me to the client, and asked me a couple of questions along the way. The second client, he asked me a lot more questions. Afterwards he pointed out things I can improve.

It won't be easy, but on the other hand, I know exactly what he's talking about, and I can try to focus in on those areas.

And he invited me to take on more responsibility working with him the following week.

I'm proud of myself because:

1. I set a goal of improving my Dutch - and met it.
2. I set a goal of learning about personal training - and met it.
3. I established trust and professionalism, which opened the door to getting some practical experience as a trainer.
4. I am getting that practical experience, which is an ongoing challenge.
5. I can see that I can do anything I want to do. There is no door closed to me, except the ones I choose not to open.

Fitness Forward

I'm almost finished my personal training course. I have still to finish my online final exam, and wait a week for the results. I also have to complete a first-aid course and submit the certificate in order to get my personal trainer certificate.

The course I took is the one offered through the ISSA, but it is an entirely theoretical course. Fortunately for me, I already work at a gym (called a sportschool in Holland). I talked to my boss, and he's agreed to let me shadow the personal trainers up to four mornings per week for pretty much as long as I like. I won't get paid for it, and he doesn't currently have an opening for a new trainer, but he has no problem letting me get some experience and insight into what actually is expected when doing the job.

It is different here in Holland than in Canada. In Canada, my experience with the fitness industry is a lot more like what you see on shows like The Biggest Loser, where the trainers push their clients to make major changes. In Holland, people take it much easier. Even if they want to make major changes, they do it slowly. It is quite common that people make an appointment with a friend to do something sporty, like taking a aerobics class or playing tennis or squash together, every week. It is a lot like how Canadians meet each other for coffee or to go shopping!

In any case, the course I did was in English, so there are quite a few things I'll be learning during my shadowing.

1. Names of body parts, exercises and muscles in Dutch
2. How to explain ideas and exercises
3. How to match someone's goals and personality with a program
4. How to teach them the program
5. How to work with them to succeed

I'm pretty excited about this opportunity! I don't know if I want to be a personal trainer myself, but fitness has been a hobby of mine for quite some time. I took the course with the idea that if it was only for my own personal benefit, then it was still worth it.

I have noticed some changes already. Learning how to work with a client can only continue to help me. I have tended to create awesome, yet unreasonable, workout plans for myself. After learning only theoretically how to make a plan for someone else, I started to make more reasonable plans for myself. I noticed my success improving as I was able to reach my much more reasonable goals for my fitness activities.

I want that to carry over into other areas of my life. The more I learn to set myself reasonable, achievable goals, the more I will succeed at what I want to accomplish. And fitness is a great start!

Self-Control

I want to really enjoy 2011. I mean, I've enjoyed all the years I've lived so far, so no reason why not, but I think I can do away with some excess baggage, and then who knows what possibilities await me!!!

I love to read. I am so glad that one of J's cousins also loves to read... and in ENGLISH... because I get to borrow his books! Now, I do enjoy reading in Dutch, but I haven't really found a Dutch or Flemish author who writes the kinds of book I like to read. I love detective stories. I like the ones with a bit of violence, a bit of psychological suspense, or a bit of philosophy. Best are all three. And one of my long-time favourite authors is Robert B. Parker, and I admire many things about his character, Spenser.

One book, early on in the series, has Spenser teach a teen-age boy about self-control. He did it by helping the boy develop physical strength, learn some useful skills, taught him some social manners and expected him to explore his own wants, needs and interests. I really enjoyed this book.

And it got me thinking about self-control, and self-discipline. And so I decided to just work on getting up at the same time every day, even if I'm tired.

Today is Day 2. So far, so good.

Yesterday I went to the gym for the morning class. I really enjoyed that. I went to bed a bit earlier than normal, but not much. Just as we were finally going to bed, I got really grumpy about all the things I still didn't do during the day. I wrote them all down, and I am spending some time today working on some of them. I'll keep doing that so that all that anxiety that comes up when I'm tired can have an outlet.

I'm also going to keep working on going to bed earlier. I think I got so grumpy just because I was tired! I am curious about what I'm tired signals I've been missing!

I was hoping to go to a meditation-evening tonight. I want to develop my ability to do nothing. Currently, me doing nothing is still me going a mile a minute, which is one reason why I find falling asleep and bedtime so anxiety-provoking. Unfortunately, it was cancelled. On the other hand, I get to participate in this class in the gym! My favourite!

Poo On My Shoes

Today I went to the gym. Usually I bring my sneakers, but I was running late so I just wore my sneakers.

The recent frost seems to have melted. I know this because the unpleasant odor coming from my shoes was thanks to my cat. The one that wants to go outside all the time. Now I know why.

She likes to go poo just outside the door to our shed, where I keep my bike. Nice.

I hate gardening, but I guess I'll have to go out with the shovel and shovel up cat poos along with any weeds I can dig up. I feel that since we moved into this house, I've done nothing but dig up weeds. I had no idea how much work a garden is. Next house will be an apartment! No stairs, which my knees don't like, and no garden!!! And, bonus... no cat poos!