Friday, May 13, 2011

Doing the Right Thing

I'm really starting to wonder if right is such a good guide to my life.

By right I mean the standard of just, honest, and honourable to which I hold myself. It's very high. And uncomfortable.

I found myself feeling so free the other day when I decided to just not do my French homework. It matters only to me if I do it, and I had a lot on the go and would have had to sacrifice precious downtime to do it. And even though I chose to take the French class, and expected homework, suddenly this responsibility was no fun at all. But that's why I took the class - to have fun. So I didn't do my homework.

And the world kept on turning.


I felt a bit guilty, but also relieved. I don't have to be the perfect French student, I can be a mediocre French student. My priority isn't to be the best student, it's to have fun and enjoy learning.

I guess this is learning to set priorities. Doing right doesn't have to have the same status as other priorities all the time.

Perhaps seeing doing right as a character trait is better than seeing it as a priority. As a person, I feel satisfied with myself when I behave in certain ways. And I have found myself struggling to accept that others are satisfied with a life that I see as lesser. I find it very important to do right. I take pride in doing right. It's tough, but I'm strong.

And the more I enjoy my life, and my French class, the more I'm doing right.

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